Isn't it strange that I who have written only unpopular books hould be such a popular fellow?
-Albert Einstein
Add your quotes for this wednesday, and pull together your letters for the letter contest, see yesterdays letter for an example. (Submitals are tomorrow).
Submittal's tomorrow!! Crap! I gotta get on my persecution box and get to typing. Okay, so here's a quote or two:
"The essence of my manhood was being threatened. . ." - Uju "100%" Kamalu
"DA plays bass? I thought he had a lot of soul. . .you have to have soul to play the bass."
-Javann Jones, on learning that DA played the bass
"Man, drugs are great!"
-Jeremy Myers
"Oh, look, someone's playing the piano, I thought they actually had music. . ."
-Ana
"This better not end up on some website"
- Ana, after realizing that she said the above
"I think they're closed. There's plywood all over the door. . ."
-Javann Jones
"Well, its Fred's, but its no Fred Meyers."
-Jared Flint
"Yeah, he's pretty much black. . .don't let the small white boy facade fool you."
-Javann Jones, to someone he didn't know
"Did anyone else realize we were trading racial quips with the cashier back there?"
-Javann Jones, upon realizing that he said the above
"I'm going to ask Jeremy where he gets his dry cleaning done at. He's Jeremy, he's got to get a deal on it"
-Javann Jones, after paying for his dry cleaning
Yep Fred's def is no Fred Meyer. Fred Meyer is so great I wrote a song about it once.
And on the Drug comment... well this assumes you have a cold... (afraid of my own miscontrued thought)... and yes anna we all have to be afraid now... even the originator.
Posted by: itzjerm at March 3, 2004 09:23 AM"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.""
-Jack Handy
Javann we had an agreement remember...now it is time to tell everyone about the beef jerky smell, we had to put up with all night! :^)
Posted by: Ana at March 3, 2004 03:09 PMbeef jerky smell?
Posted by: itzjerm at March 3, 2004 03:40 PM"The course of true love never did run smooth."
~Shakespeare
"In the immortal words of The Doors, 'The time to hesitate is through.'"
~Lucas, "Empire Records"
"No we mustn't dwell. Not today. We can't! Not on Rex Manning day!!"
~Mark, "Empire Records"
"If you were a hot dog, would you eat yourself?? I would!"
~Will Ferrell, SNL
"SO??? Girls fart too!!"
~Sheena (you're a genius!!!)
"JANNA...I HAVE TO HAVE IT!!!"
~Me
"Man, eating those bean with that beef jerky was a bad idea." - Javann Jones
Posted by: Hey Zeus at March 3, 2004 04:54 PMTrying is the first step towards failure
--Homer Simpson
Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.
--Homer Simpson
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
--Jack Handy
Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.
--Jack Handy
If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like now.
--Jack Handy
Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
--Mark Twain
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
--Mark Twain
"So what's up with they "Hey Ya" song,i kinda like it."- Greg Goshea
"Look what i can do!"- Stuart(SNL)
Posted by: shee at March 3, 2004 05:43 PM"One must not want anything to change. Not forward, not backward, not ever."-Nietzsche
Posted by: Jon Houser at March 3, 2004 07:10 PM"That Shakespear was a Real Crack Pot"
-My Studies commentary on bad writings.
Posted by: itzjerm at March 3, 2004 08:16 PMBrian to Peter:
"Hey! My Alphabits cereal spelled something!! It says 'OOOO'!"
Peter to Brian:
"Those are cheerios"
Stuart is on Mad TV, Jack Handy owns (like Starsky and Hutch will own), it makes me feel warm inside we people recognize my soul, and it's cute when girls fart.
OH! And a quote! From my buddy Nick Woodruff, while on vacation with his family:
"I've lived with you WAY too long to fall for your road-trip tricks!!!"
Posted by: D.A. at March 4, 2004 08:18 AMMy new fav saying is: whatever floats u'r boat and finds u'r lost remote!
Posted by: mel at March 6, 2004 06:21 PM